To The Moon and Back
The longer I live — the more I learn — the more I learn — the less I know. Ironic, huh? But there are some things I’ve learned well and they are the things which have allowed me to survive. I know how to love and laugh. I know how to truly cherish, whether it is people, or moments in time. And I just thought maybe you would like to know that you are one of the things I cherish most. You were sent to me as the answer to the most fervent prayer I ever prayed. I wanted to be a mom more than anything else in the world.
You brought me such joy. Immense joy. Just looking at you took my breath away. You were captivating, irresistible, and very independent from the moment you came into this world. You arrived with your eyes wide open; alert and curious. You immediately displayed, what would become by the time you approached puberty, a familiar defiance. When the doctor slapped the bottoms of your feet, you didn’t cry, you just shot him “the look.” He had to slap them twice more to get you to take your first breath, which is why I have often said you were born with attitude.
In those first few days you managed to wrap us all around your tiny little finger just by hinting at a smile while you slept. Oh yes, it’s true, we never even thought to turn the television on. My parents and my grandparents had driven all the way from Ohio to California to help celebrate your arrival. It was so exciting for us. We just sat around the bassinet and stared at you, while patting ourselves on the back, of course, for providing such perfect genes. You were our long-awaited miracle and you had us utterly mesmerized. You were my first child, the first grandchild, and the first great-grandchild. Alot was resting on your tiny little shoulders but you demonstrated from the get-go, that you were up to the task.
In no time, you were a most delightful and engaging toddler. As a pre-schooler you were so incredibly smart and always happy. You had this wonderfully contagious giggle and even when you didn’t like something, you were still adorable. Your little hand would go your hip and you had this sweet little pout. Yep, you effortlessly charmed everyone you encountered.
Before you even turned two, fate intervened, and it was just me and you. For the next sixteen years or so, every breath I took was through you, for you, or because of you. You inspired me, motivated me, gave me strength, and gave me hope. You kept me going and kept me laughing. We were partners — you and I. It was us against the world and we were winning. We were the dynamic duo. Batman and Robin had nothing on us. Together, we knew we could survive anything that life threw at us — and we did. We even managed to overcome cancer. YOU became the strong one. The funny one. The inspirational one. You reminded me to pray and to thank God every day. You were the reason I kept going. Your laughter could ease the harshest pain, overcome the most devastating despondency, and your hugs were far beyond magical.
You are no less a miracle to me now then you were when you were born and you are still my greatest joy. “I love you to the moon and back”.
Dedicated to my beautiful daughter, Larann Jane
November 20th, 2011 at 07:05
What a wonderful tribute to your daughter! She will cherish this post forever as she will her memories of you, dear friend. You have inspired me to want to write tributes to my own children. Thank you so much for the beautiful words and inspiration to go with them.
January 1st, 2012 at 16:44
You are right, we did make it, and it was all because of you! You have always, been my biggest cheerleader, and my biggest fan! Through “All” the trials and tribulations in our lives, you have shown me what it is to be a strong independent women! I am So very Proud of you, and all that you have had to overcome! Most people would have crumbled being handed “Cancer twice”, But not you!! You showed me that NO matter what life deals you, you have a choice! To watch it pass by or jump on board, and enjoy the ride. I am Honored to have “You” as my little mama!! You are my reason for being Inspired and getting through the toughest times in “Our” lives! So… Thank-You, for showing me the Best of the Best, and never giving up on you or me! Simple words cannot express my Gratitude to you, and all that you have pushed me to do, without even ‘saying a word. I Love you, with all that i am!!! Your daughter, Larann